A secret pact and a damaged sister code came to make the two women very mature
A lady turned to the internet for advice after refusing to help her homeless sister.
The story, posted on an anonymous forum on Reddit, detailed a broken pact from years past that also haunts the two brothers to the point that they have been estranged ever since.
While most of the story’s themes were extremely relatable, it was the extremes to which things were taken that seemed to captivate readers on the AITA (Am I The A-hole) discussion forum.
Read on to see how OP (aka the “original poster”) became estranged from her sister and how the past she left behind was brought back into her life.
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Authentic AITA post on Reddit
“Before we got married, my husband lived in a nice little house that he kept and added my name to the deed and now we use as a vacation residence,” OP wrote, kicking off the post. “We only use it two or three times a year and often let friends or family stay there for a few days or once a week if they want to get away.”
“That was not a problem for us at all,” she explained. “But we were asked to let my estranged sister and her husband stay and I said no. My husband is 100% in agreement with me on this. My sister and her husband are currently homeless. They had been renting for several years and in the same place for a long time, but were kicked out due to issues with the landlord and are determined to need a place to stay until they find a more permanent place. ”
Why does this feel like a teen fanfiction drama?
OP then provided some information about her past history with said brother.
“My sister and I were very close since childhood. My greatest friend throughout my childhood was a man. The man who is now married to my sister, for many who can probably guess. I’ve always had a huge crush on him and, in fact, I was already in love with him when we were in our 20s.
She went on to detail how a secret pact was made between her and her brother.
“My sister also had a man she loved, but not very well. After I was 20, we were all at a party and the man my sister preferred flirted with me. My sister was upset even though I hadn’t flirted again and informed him that I hadn’t. She told me we don’t do anything with guys who prefer the opposite. I agreed. I would never have done that to her anyway.”
Of course, this would not be an AITA proposal if the pact were maintained on both sides.
“A year or two later, my relationship with my best friend changed. He was flirting with me and I was flirting again. He was more physically affectionate and started kissing me and it seemed like we were slowly becoming more than just best friends.
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However, “things were progressing like this and out of nowhere I found out that he and my sister were a couple and started sleeping together. He told me he wanted to keep his options open and my sister told me that she really loved him and that she wanted me to understand.”
“I called her a hypocrite for doing this when she turned on me for the man she preferred to flirt with me after I turned him down and then promise and make me promise that we would never do that to each other. She informed me that it was completely different. I told her I would never trust her or look at her the same way again. They informed me that I did not know him. I informed him that he was upset about helping me when I needed my sister. Our family stood by me afterward, especially my other two brothers. I haven’t seen or spoken to my sister or her husband since.”
OP then returned to the current one.
“It was our mother and father who helped organize the request for a place to stay. And they were disappointed when I said no,” she wrote. “My different sister and brother are firmly on my side and were disgusted by my sister and her husband until they dared to ask me. My sister said that at least I can achieve my dream because I am married and have children and she will not have any. And the least I can do is put aside the little children’s dramas to help them not become homeless. My sister and her husband called me a bitch for refusing and even my parents said I was going too far with distancing by refusing to help.
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The Web (largely) agreed with the OP – but why?
As noted above, the OP received largely support on the Reddit forum with the top-rated comment providing some practical advice.
“NTA, however, are you worried that they might go to your cabin anyway? I can be sure of this to protect property and locks,” they wrote, garnering hundreds of upvotes.
“I’m not too scared because we recently modified the locks so no one else could let them in,” she wrote in response.
When another tried to single out the OP by saying, “You owe your sister a big thank you. She bought the man and is now homeless. You bought a runner-up and he gave you a vacation home,” she replied. “In truth no. Even though my ex-best friend was a huge jerk. Still, my sister treated me like shit.
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Another commenter weighed in, explaining why the OP’s decision was excellent in the first place: “They’ll be homeless because ‘landlord points’ means they’re being kicked out. They can become invaders in your home. By no means let someone who is homeless due to irresponsibility (monetary or otherwise) relocate. By no means let someone who is jealous of what you will have transfer. thoughts pondering what the universe owes you.”
When someone else asked, “(Do your mom and dad organize two separate holidays with you two apart?” OP responded, “They don’t. My siblings and I (the same siblings I speak to, though) take turns hosting and our parents can choose whether they visit us or my distant sister.
“You don’t like it when people say YOU are going too far, it’s family, blah, blah… but THEY don’t take a step to help because it would make them feel discouraged,” noted another Redditor. “Parents can help or why don’t parents ask other siblings or the husband’s family. People who have had issues with their landlord (a long time ago) are NOT people you want in your home. Maintain agency.”
A year or two later, my relationship with my best friend changed. He was flirting with me and I was flirting again. He was extremely physically affectionate and started kissing me and it seemed like we were slowly becoming more than just best friends.
When another asked why her sister and former best friend didn’t just stay with her mom and dad, OP wrote, “I don’t know. They probably just don’t want to.”
When it came to criticism, it largely consisted of commenters who believed, as one put it, “It looks like you never bought into this guy – that must be really uncomfortable for your poor husband.”
To which OP replied: “I bought it. I in no way believed the way my sister treated me.
“The amount of people who think the man is the problem in this situation is confusing me,” insisted one Redditor, claiming: “What she cares about and can (quite rightly) never forgive is a sister who treated her like trash as revenge for something OP didn’t even do. The difficulty is that the OP’s sister is a shitty person. How is this not clicking??”
This inspired OP to note again: “I think some people just see her buying it as jealousy. But the way she treated me wasn’t like a sister, it wasn’t the way you deal with family and it wasn’t the way you would deal with a friend. And she or he knew. That wasn’t her being unconscious. She knew what would happen and she didn’t care and acted as if my hurt at the time was so irrational and self-centered.
Some were struck by the middle school and high school nature of the drama that neither party ever got over — as one wrote, “Why does this feel like a teen fanfiction drama?”
However, when another noted, “the whole back story sounds like jealous teenagers trying to make up,” wrote OP, “I never at least tried to get over her. I liked and supported her and in no way did I do anything to harm her. But she treated me horribly.”
Elsewhere, she also explained that the distancing had been going on for about “11 or 12 years”.
When another person noted that “20-year-olds mess up when it comes to relationships,” she continued to defend the years-long grudge, saying she was “completely happy not to have her in my life after she treated me like she did.” .”
What do you suppose?
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